Trust is another essential ingredient in a happy and healthy marriage. Trust means believing in your spouse and their ability to be faithful, honest, and reliable. It also means feeling comfortable sharing your thoughts and feelings with them, knowing that they will not judge you. It shows itself in how comfortable you are in their decision-making. Trust is like a foundation. How high a building can go is mostly dependent on how deep the foundation is. How deep the trust is is how high a relationship can spring.
Here are some specific ways to build trust in marriage:
Be honest with your spouse: This means being truthful with them, even when it is difficult. I find some couples wondering if they can share certain information with their spouses. Trust is built on honesty. Honesty is essential for building trust and respect in a marriage as it gives your partner peace and stability around you. Do not entertain mostly-harmless white lies, questionable grey lies, or real lies. Dishonesty breaks emotional intimacy and creates isolation. If you have to lie about it, then it's not worth doing in the first place. Be honest about your finances in marriage. Openness about money in marriage can break or make a marriage. Being lied to is an insult to one's intelligence. Prov 8:20,
Be faithful to your spouse: This means being committed to your marriage and to your spouse. It also means avoiding any behavior that could be seen as infidelity. Some secrets when kept away from your partner are seen as being unfaithful. Having an emotional relationship with someone other than your spouse is seen as cheating. If there are some laid down agreements and one party breaks the agreement the other may consider it as being unfaithful to your promise. If you've agreed to not see someone and you go ahead to see them without communicating it first with your partner, they may see it as being unfaithful. 1 Cor 4:2, Moreover, it is required of stewards that they be found faithful.
Be reliable: This means keeping your promises and being there for your spouse when they need you. It also means being someone that your spouse can count on. This is trust. Ask yourself, how much do you value your words? Will you stick to it until it's done? A reliable person is consistent throughout the journey. Can your spouse trust you with certain information? Can you stay true to your words without pulling the rug from under their feet? Make promises you can keep and don't compromise. Deu 7:9, Understand, therefore, that the LORD your God is indeed God. He is the faithful God who keeps his covenant for a thousand generations…
Be open and communicative: This means sharing your thoughts and feelings with your spouse, even when they are difficult. It also means listening to your spouse and being respectful of their opinions. You'd be shocked to know the amount of trust that is built when someone knows they can confide in you without being judged, condemned, or having their opinions belittled. Provs 15:1, A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger.
Be forgiving: Everyone makes mistakes, so it is important to be forgiving of your spouse. When your spouse makes a mistake, try to see it from their perspective and be willing to forgive them. And when you've forgiven them, try not to make it a reference anytime they're in the wrong. It doesn't tell that you've really forgiven them. 1 Cor 13:5, …It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged.
Trust is not always easy to build, but it is essential for a happy and healthy marriage. If you can learn to trust your spouse, you will be well on your way to a long and fulfilling relationship.
Here are some additional tips for building trust in marriage:
Be consistent: If you say you are going to do something, do it. This shows your spouse that you can be counted on. If you promised to help with chores at home, try hard to keep the promise. The trash especially, lol.
Be transparent: Be open about your activities and your relationships with other people. This shows your spouse that you have nothing to hide. "Hey buddy, my ex texted me out of the blue today. I don't know what she's looking for but guess what? I sent her a picture of us happy." Be transparent about how you manage your finances as much as possible.
Be respectful: Treat your spouse with respect, even when you disagree with them. This shows them that you value their opinion and that you care about their feelings. Name calling is a bad foot to stand on. If you prefer to discuss a matter later, respectfully communicate it. Silent treatment shouldn't be used as a weapon.
Be patient: Trust takes time to build. Don't expect it to happen overnight. Just keep working at it and eventually, you will build a strong foundation of trust in your marriage. Don't compare your marriage to one that has stood the test of time or better still, don't compare at all. Be content with where you are and build upon that. Love is patient. What you may not see now, given time, may work out.
Trust is the glue that holds a marriage together. If you can build trust with your spouse, you will be well on your way to a happy and healthy marriage.